The Daily Habit: Weird News

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I May Be Dead, But I Ain’t No Decoration – MARINA del RAY, CALIFORNIA – Have you ever had a momentary lapse of reason, or at least a good random Grateful Dead moment that’s worthy of keeping forever?  If you’re sub-culturally illiterate, that means have you ever had a weird flashback where your mind’s eye was playing tricks on you?  Like maybe that one time when you were traveling down the interstate and swore you saw a giant bag of weed laying on the side of the road, then you bugged your buddy for a good half hour until he went all the way back and got what turned out to be a pile of grass and some plastic left behind by the DOT?  Or maybe that one time when you jumped for joy when thought you saw the FBI busting your drug dealing, no good, smack shooting neighbor, but it was really L’ Immigre handcuffing the drug-running illegal immigrant hiding in his basement?  If not, you just had to know that the corpse on the neighbor’s porch wasn’t part of the holiday spirit this year.  Well, maybe not.

The body of an elderly man sat decomposing on his Marina del Rey balcony for nearly a week because care-free neighbors thought the lifeless figure was a Halloween decoration done in poor taste.  Apparently the man had been dead since last Monday when CIS experts believed he took his own life.  He found was slumped over a chair on the the balcony of his apartment with what appeared to be small caliber gunshot would to his eye, yet nobody called to report gunshots or file a missing person’s report.

One unusually nosey neighbor finally minded his own damn business  and didn’t bother to call the Feds because “he, er, ah, it,  looked like an everyday Halloween dummy that people make out of a broom and old clothes,” he said.  “The body has been sitting up there in that chair dead and nobody did a goddamn thing”  he added, “but it looked so freaking real from down here.  Go figure.”  (,0,3558556.story)

Due to the sensitive nature of the death, the coroner’s office has yet to publicly release the cause of death, and residents of the complex were unavailable for comment.  In all reality it’s no surprise that the coroner hasn’t made a statement.  The local cops totally embarassed themselves, and so did the man’s neighbors.  How can a rotting corpse go undetected by nibby neighbors for an entire week?  The smell alone would be enough to prompt a complaint, but it is close to Halloween and stranger things have been known to happen.  And so goes the ditty, “Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat, or at least give me something to cover up the smell of that dead body.”


~ by the115 on 10/19/2009.

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