The Daily Habit: Weird News

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I was Riding My Motorcyle Naked and Got a Goddamn DUI – OCALA, FLORIDA –  Those crazy rednecks down in north Florida will do just about anything for a good time.  They’re bred wild up in those foot hills on the Florida- Alabama border so they have the  hillybilly look with a surfer dude attitude.  They like fast bikes, fast chics, and lots of booze.  Any combination of the three is one wild ass biker party on wheels.  Throw in a cowoby hat, some nudity and the cops, then the party is over.

An Ocala Florida man was charged with a DUI after he was nabbed riding his crotch rocket naked on a public highway.  A deputy was driving on Interstate 75 early Tuesday morning enjoying his donuts and coffee when he passed a  man on a motorcycle wearing nothing but a cheap cowboy har.  He repeated signaled the naked man to pull over but the guy just kept on bare backing it up the road.  After what turned out to be a  high speed chase the cop caught up with the freeballer at a red light and pulled him over.

Once stopped the biker boy couldn’t say where he was from or why he the hell was naked.   When asked if he had been drinking the man said “You bet your goddamn sweet ass I was drinking, dude.  I don’t know where the hell I left my clothes but I can tell you I drank a shitload of Pabts Blue Ribbon and a boot ful of Fleischman’s man.”  A breathalyzer showed that his blood alcohol levels was twice the state’s legal limit to drive. (

After he was given some clothes and processd at the sheriff’s station it was learned that it was the perp’s fifth DUI in Florida, and 9th overall.   There was also a criminal history of public nudity, streaking at the truck pulls, and freeballing on his tractor.  He was later released on $20,000 bail and was not permitted to drive his motorcylce unless fully clothed.  A judge will decide whehter or not to impose automatic sentencing for a 10 time loser who can’t keep his pants on while driving a motorcycle or hold his licquor.


~ by the115 on 09/24/2009.

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