The Daily Habit: Health

 9:10 pm

Five Places to Feed Your Fat Face-  If you enjoy the finer things in life, then you’re probably an expert on art.  You know all of the artists, the best places to buy, and the difference between a masterpiece and a masterbator.  If fast cars are your cup of tea then you’re no stranger to Cobra GTs, Porsche and Bentley.  When you need something fixed or want to buy something to pick up chicks you know where to go and who to see.  If you’re  total bitch who sits around and gorges everything in the house, check out these five calorie factories where you can feed your fat face for next to nothing.

1.  Burger King – Steakhouse Burger- 950 calories, 59g fat and 55g carbs- They don’t call the place Burger King for nothing.  Pig out on these and your queen will surely dump you  for the  fruity fry guy.

2.  Carl’s Jr.- The Kentucky Bourbon Six-Dollar Burger- 970 calories, 49g fat, 81g carbs.  The bourbon ain’t bad but the greasy 2 pound slab of meat that goes with it will clog your arteries for a month.

3.  Jack in the Box- Mini Sirloin Burgers- 748 calories, 29g fat, and 77g carbs- Three of anything is great, unless it’s a trio of fatty burgers with all the fixings. 

4.  Wendy’s- Coffee Toffee Twisted Frosty- 540 calories, 20g fat, and 83gcarbs-  Coffee, toffee and frosty sound like over-the-hill strippers with fat asses and beer guts. 

5.  Taco Bell- Volcano Box- 1,380 calories, 76g fat, and 133g carbs- This gut-busting variety platter erupts with a double beef burrito, two tacos and a giant bag of cinnamon twists.   It will also erupt in liquid form an hour later (http://food.yahoo.com/blog/hungrygirl/29929/new-fast-food-calorie-violators/).

So, the next time you get the hankering of hunger for something tasty in your tummy, take your time when choosing a restaurant, and what you’re going to eat.  If you’re a calorie counter who’s watching the waste line then get the rice cakes and diet water on the healthy choice menu for gerbils.  If you’re a total fat ass who enjoys strapping a feed bucket to the back of your head at a burger joint, order one of the above and feed your fat face until you pass out from the affects of an unhealthy fast food frenzy.

 
 

 

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~ by the115 on 07/29/2009.

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