The Daily Habit: Culture

Go to fullsize imageGo to fullsize image 10:49 pm

8 Tips for Being Cheap at the Movies-  Has the pervading financial strain that’s plaguing America, made you more and more aware of your spending habits?  If so, join the club.  Lot’s of former six figure hot-shots are scrambling to find ways to pench a few pennies on the vices in life, and in some social circles it’s growing to be chic.  Embarassing as all hell but yes, tres chic for former snobs who thought they could just walk through live without being inconvenienced.  Some of creative ones are scouring the internet for coupons in between  job hunting sessions on and junk  selling on Craigslist.  Others are walking along highways or driving through random neighborhoods looking for rusty old metal chairs or pop cans to be salvaged at the local scrap yard.  There are even some serious cheapskates who are so dead broke they’re willing to do anything they can,  just to see a free movie.  If you’re an el cheapo when it comes to getting your fix for film, here are 8 tips for making your trip to the porno house even thriftier.

1.  Look for freebies.  If it’s free it has to suck, but you’re homeless so who cares?

2.  Clip coupons.  That buy one free pedicure get one free with a purchase of a matinee at regular price will come in real handy after your shower at the Y.

3.  Find a Drive-In nearby.  That way you can walk over, since your car was repossessd.  It’s easier to sneak in that way.

4.  Check out independent theaters.  Being the neighborhood peeping tom has it’s setbacks, but at least you’ll know who puts out.

5.  Buy in bulk.  That hp of Northern Lights makes every movie funny, and the 5o pound box of Milk Duds kills the munchies too.

6.  Trade up on snacks.  Get the Bladder Buster of cola and garbage bag full of buttered popcorn, especially if you did 1 ees on the way over.

7.  Go at Off Times.  Nobody will be there at noon when you roll out bed, except other stoners with the same idea, and the same hook up as you.

8. Be loyal. If you’re going to sneak in with your own stash and snacks, you may as go to the same place every night.  Maybe they won’t remember you either.

So fellow losers,  don’t resign yourself to a summer of bi-monthly unemployment checks, shitty TV reruns and stale canned beer. With a good connection and a few sneaky tricks, a night at the movies is more affordable than you might think.  All you have to do is wake and bake, walk over to the plaza with your waist pouch full of quality kern and a backpack full of shoplifted  goods (cause you’re going the whole show to yourself). Once you get there and jimmy the back door loose, just sneak in for the matinee show like you paid full price.  May as well. It don’t cost nothing.




~ by the115 on 07/05/2009.

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