11:59 pm

Wait Here Son.  Daddy Needs a Lap Dance – INDIANAPOLIS -  Do you remember way back to the days when  your old man was young and stupid?  You may have been a bouncing lad, or even a Cub Scout, but it didn’t really matter because he made some foolish decisions.  Like that one time when he got so drunk he drove the car into the garage with no hands, only the door was down and he smashed mommy’s car to pieces.  Or  there was that other time when he ran out on the field durig little league game and yelled at you for striking out on a 3-0 count, then he beat the hell out of the ump  for getting nosey.   Well, that’s nothing.  This guy lost his kid and car, but he did get a lap dance and a few drinks before getting busted.

A Indianapolis man was arrested and spent the night in county lockup after he left his 5-year-old son in a semi-truck while he went inside of a stripper club for a few beers and a private lap dance.  After a few hours of fun he left but was too hammered to remember where he parked, so called the cops and reported the truck stolen.  Afer combing the area  the police found the truck, and a 5 year old boy inside drinking beer and watching pornos. The keys were in the ignition, and the doors were unlocked, and there were nudie mags all over the place.  (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091124/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_father_arrested_strip_club)

For his blantant stupidity he was charged with child neglect and public intoxication charges, then his wife beat the hell out of him after bailing him out.  He also had to paint the living room, snake the septic tank, and walk up and down the front of the trailer park entrance holding a sign that says “I’m a pervert who left his 5 year old son alone in an 18 wheelers while I went in to a stripper bar for a lap dance with a happy ending.”  Nothing like a little trailer park justice for a bad dad with blue balls and a thirst for booze and strippers. Maybe if bought junior a table dance or two there wouldn’t have been any problems, at least not till mommy found out. 

Hedonistic Thanksgiving

http://www.alternet.org/story/144201/drink_some_booze,_smoke_a_joint_and_relax:_how_to_have_a_hedonistic_thanksgiving?page=1

Lobster Ghost Traps

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091126/ap_on_re_us/us_lobster_ghost_traps

Auction for The Real Alice’s 1st Edition

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20091124/media_nm/us_books_alice

 11:59 pm

Ho, Ho, Ho.  Classic Holiday Scams – AMERICA -  If you’re like everybody else in America, you’re dead broke, or damn close, and that no good money pit of a holiday called Christmas is right around the corner.  Yeah, you tried to put a few bucks away each pay but your weed habit and addiction to take-out always seemed to get in the way.  If you put away $20 it went to extra cheese and pepperoni. If you stashed $50 it was shelled out for a satch of blueberry fields.  Now, with Xmas around the corner, you’re going into panic mode and have to take the el-cheapo route to holiday giving.  If that’s the case, use you’re head Jimmy, and not your dipstick.  Beware of these classic holiday scams or you’ll be waiting on the roof to rob Santa  at gunpoint.

1.  Hidden debit card fees.  That set of authentic ninja swords on Ebay was a killer deal, until that $200 debit sur-charge chopped its way onto your bill.

2.  Half-off sales.  That turkey deep fryer and sniper paint ball gun were half off, but they jacked up the price 100% the day before the sale.

3.  Extended warranties.  That 2 year replacement warranty on the battery operated nose hair trimmers was great, until you found out it cost $850 to ship the replacement covered under the warranty.

4.  Gift card fees.  What a great way to give somebody $100  to get what they want, only it costs $250 to buy one.

5. Return fees.  All items car be returned after 365 days, but they have to be shipped in the same packaging, and there is a $250 restocking fee to cover any depreciation of the item. (http://finance.yahoo.com/family-home/article/108213/worst-holiday-gotchas). 

It’s a fact of life that the holidays are tough on your budget, but you know you can’t do a damn thing about it.   You don’t want to spend more than you planned but also don’t want to look like a total cheapskate in front of the whole freaking famil on Christmans morning.  If you play your cards right you can find lots of cheap knockoffs on Ebay for a fraction of the cost.  And, if you cough up the dough with PayPal, then you’re pretty much home free, unless you buy from an overseas seller. If you do, chances are that $120 in-dash DVD player for a Hynundai Accent will end up being a box of Chinese food menus from Peking and after filing a PayPal complait and winning, it will cost you $850 to ship it back for a refund.  Ho, ho, ho. Merry freaking Xmas.

3. 

2.

Sarkozy Burying Camus

http://news.yahoo.com/s/time/20091124/wl_time/08599194239200

Climate Changing Faster

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/sci_climate_09_post_kyoto

Rare Darwin Edition Found

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091122/ap_en_bu/eu_britain_darwin

  11:59 pm

7  Signs He Could Care Less – AMERICA - Ladies, do you find yourself sitting around all day pondering over that no-good quagmire in life, a.k.a. your so-called boyfriend?  Is he playing reindeer games with your heart, or at least what you think might be a game, and you’re losing?  If so, it might be time to start thinking about moving on and finding someone else to nag.    If you’re in denial, think about it this way…. he’s trying to throw you a wicked message to getoutskie, but you’re  pretty lousy at playing catch the hint. With this in mind, i f you’re still not co-siginng on these signals, here are 7 signs your man could care less.

1.  He never texts at the right time.  He never texts at the wrong time either.  Hell, he doesn’t text period.

2.  He doesn’t want to see you.  Why would he?  You’re old news but aren’t getting the hint.

3.  You don’t pass the distance test. He wants to be as far away from you as possible.

4.  You don’t stack up to things he likes to do.  Unless your making pizza and fetching beers during the Steeler game, he wants nothing to do with you.

5.  He doesn’t find time for you.  He has no time because he’s boinkin a new chick, only you don’t know about her yet.

6.  You don’t see his other side.  Of course you don’t.  He broke up with you a year ago.

7.  You don’t have down time together. You don’t have up time either because he’s been trying to tell you to get lost for months. (http://dating.personals.yahoo.com/singles/datingtips/88570/dating-tips-7-signs-hes-serious-about-you/)

Farewell Saab

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091124/ap_on_bi_ge/us_gm_saab