The Daily Habit: Entertainment
11:33 pm
Bailout Woes: Paying for Porn- In recent months the American financial system has come tumbling down, mostly due to blatantly stupidity by the Fed, SEC, and of course little Georgie Bush and his pack of jackals. First it was AIG, then the Lehman Brothers, General Motors, Chrysler, and the list goes on and on. All of these companies, led by money-grubbing CEOs, came crawling to Congress and pleaded for a piece of the American financial bailout. But now another major American industry is asking for assistance as the global financial crisis continues: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry. “The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine” (Entertainment: Bailout Woes: Paying for Porn). Francis also feels that the US government should actively support the adult industry’s survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people. Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow. But the industry leaders said the issue is a nation in need. “People are too depressed to be sexually active,” Flynt said in the statement. “This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex.” So far, there has been no congressional reaction to the request, but there will be sooner or later. Where there’s powerful men, there’s always money and lots of hookers ripe for the plucking, behind closed doors of course. If given the option to pick between the faltering automobile industry and raunchy porn, it’s a good 0ld American politician’s duty to pick what he knows best: sex, and lots of it, so why not pay for it with tax payer’s money? Here’s a good one. Why are policians always on top? Because they can only screw up. Get it?
This bailout could also help the medical industry. Think about how much of that $5 billion would go towards breast enlargements. Crazy.. and I support it wholeheartedly
Of course, all of it should be appropriated for just that cause.